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Online Dating: A Man’s Most Important State of Mind

There are untold riches in the form of female companionship waiting for you online if only you’ll change one thought regarding how you’ll find success there.

Most men have this idea that they are “winning” when they take a woman to bed. Somehow, they’ve won the prize.

Think about how this works in your own mind. What are your own thoughts about winning the lottery? One in a million? Worse?

How often have you actually won a prize in a contest or drawing? Not many, I’d assume.

And so, if you think of “getting a woman” or even “getting a date” as the prize, your mind will automatically cause you to play in the same defeatist, resigned way you look at a contest.

And you’d depend on luck, or making it a numbers game.

If luck had anything to do with getting women, I’d have none.

Towards the end of my marriage, my wife beat my self-confidence to a pulp. I thought I was ugly, unattractive, and worthless. I lost my wife, I nearly lost my home, came within a few nickels of actually going broke. . . things were bad. Very bad.

So meeting women, for a while, was not a possibility.

But once I made this principal change in my mindset, everything changed for me.

When you truly understand how women work, you will operate wholly differently than you currently do. Women online are actually there to meet YOU, too. They view a good guy as a prize as much as you view a good woman.

  • Gay Dating Places International

So, here is the critical mindset you have to have in order to be successful online:

You are actually the prize as much as she is.

By winning her imagination and TAKING HER TO BED, you are not TAKING anything from her, but GIVING!

Success with online dating is about GIVING in order to receive.

It’s about Giving women what they want. What they REALLY want, even if they don’t say it outright.

It’s about letting women give to you what YOU want. And creating the opportunities for them to do that.

It’s about reading between the lines, and talking between the lines. And getting between the sheets.

It’s about standing out online in such a way that by the time you actually meet, she is already yours.

Doesn’t that sound like the right approach to attracting women?

To put this idea to work for you, you’ve got to work on your “pregame” thinking. Build yourself up in your own mind as being worthy (even if right now you don’t think you are), as being attractive (even if right now you don’t think you are), as smart and funny (again. . . even if there is something you have to overcome, you must believe this to be true).

The truth of the matter is, if you don’t believe you are the prize, no one else ever will.

There is one danger in all of this. Some guys take this “worthiness” too far, and come across like an arrogant Jerk. Don’t do that! Write and communicate with confidence, not arrogance, and you’ll become the prize she seeks.

  • Single Dating Places United Kingdom
    Single Dating Places United Kingdom

Online Dating – 11 Reasons To Go Online For Love

Where do you go when you are looking for love?Where do you go when you are looking for love?
Are you considering joining an online dating site but not sure it’s for you?
Let me tell you how I first discovered online dating and why I firmly believe it fits in with our modern day lifestyles.
A couple of years ago online dating still had a stigma attached to it.  Although people were using the internet as a method of dating, they did not discuss it with friends or colleagues for fear of coming across desperate.
I recall a friend of mine who was initially embarrassed to tell me she had joined an online dating site.  At the time, I was rather surprised as she was an attractive girl who would be considered quite a catch.  However, after chatting to her I completely understood why she had resorted to this method of dating; she was simply tired of meeting timewasters who were not interested in committing to a relationship. Whilst she had no desire to date some of the men who contacted her, there were quite a few she was interested in and she began a dating spell to make any “singleton” jealous.  She then struck up an online relationship with someone who lived 100 miles from her.  After exchanging many emails and chatting on the telephone, she decided to meet him. Obviously, the distance didn’t make the relationship ideal but the spark was there and she enjoyed 6 months dating someone with similar interests, shared romantic weekends together and had a fantastic holiday. Although he didn’t turn out to be “the one”, when I asked if she regretted joining an online dating site her answer was “Definitely not!”  Her view was that if she hadn’t joined an online dating site, those 6 months would have been spent moaning about meeting the same timewasters in the same old haunts and wondering “what if”.  She was simply being proactive in her search for love; after all life is far too short!

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If you’re not convinced online dating is for you, here are 11 reasons why I think online dating has its advantages:

1. You don’t have to wait until the weekend to meet someone.
2. You don’t have to get dressed up for a night “online”.  Wear whatever you feel comfortable in at home.
3. If you work unusual hours online dating fits in with your schedule. You can log on at any time of the day to suit you; there is always someone online waiting to chat.
4. If you start chatting to someone and then decide they are not what you are looking for, put them back in the net gently and choose another. There are plenty of fish in the sea!
5. If you are tired of seeing the same old faces when you go out, there are people of all age groups all across the country waiting online to meet someone.
6. If you are new to an area online dating is a great way of meeting people whether it’s for friendship or dating.  If you meet a few people online in your area, you can arrange a get together for you all rather than meeting on a one-to-one basis.
7. If all of your friends have settled down or you have recently become single what better way to meet new someone quickly than to go online and meet more singles!
8. Anonymous messaging and chat rooms let you flirt to your heart’s content without any embarrassment or getting tongue-tied.
9. You will probably find out more about someone online before you arrange a date with them than you would if you had met them in a bar.   Online dating usually makes people more cautious about who they choose to date and in this day and age that can’t be a bad thing!
10. We now live and date very differently to previous generations where the traditional place to meet people was in nightclubs, parties, at work or through friends.  By joining an online dating site you are not excluding these avenues but simply extending your opportunities of meeting someone.
11. Finally, 1 month’s membership costs less than a night out and gives you hundreds of opportunities to meet your perfect partner – every night!
With so many positive reasons to go online for love, finding your perfect partner has never been easier.  Try it out for yourself and please let me know how you’re doing.

  • Single Dating Places United Kingdom
    Single Dating Places United Kingdom

Men’s Killer Online Dating Profile Tip!

maxresdefault6Are you dating online and not meeting the women you crave and would like to meet?

I know what you are going through and it can be a lonely place when you aren’t getting the results you desire. In this situation you have to hang in there and never give up!

Tip #1
Test your replies from what you write in your first and second emails. Save your emails in a file and use the ones that get the most replies as templates…everyone is unique though.

Tip#2
You must comment on personal things she has written in her profile. To show you have made the effort to find out something about her.

And remember, nothing works 100% of the time.

I still scratch my head when a profile ignores my interest…and I match her criteria well…go figure.

I’ve just finished dating a lady and am back in the internet dating game…

And loving it…one thing about using online dating sites is that whenever you find yourself single, you can be comfortable in the knowledge that it is only a matter of time before you meet someone else.

Or just enjoy dating a few different ladies until you do…

It’s the most efficient / effective way to date that I’m aware of…

There is a LOT of women using online dating sites. This is good news for us healthy single men who don’t like hanging out in smoky bars and clubs.

Attention!
I’m about to reveal a killer profile tip which I’m certain I’ve never revealed before.

I was aware of it but never really made the effort to use it.

As I was preparing a new profile name, photo and text to go back online, I decided to make the effort.

The results have been pretty darn good, and I’ve only been back online for four weeks or so!

It’s got the type of women I’m interested in meeting, to contact me straight away.

No messing about with virtual kisses and then me having to pay for the contact.

They contacted me and sent their mobile number with the email!

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Yehaa! I like that… :-]

Are you ready, let’s look at it,

Here it is;

Men’s Killer Profile Tip!

mistakes_men_make_on_dating_sites_according_to_the_women_of_redditWhen editing or making up your profile, pretend you are a copywriter.

By this I mean imagine you have been paid by a company to write a profile convincing a client to be interested in that company’s goods.

So to do that you need to tell the reader this;

‘WHATS IN IT FOR THEM!’

Read profiles of men in your area and age group to scope out the competition.

Notice how often they use the word ‘ I.’

So you’ll see they are focusing on themselves, instead of the reader.

This is good for you, so that your profile will stand out from the crowd.

For example;

Instead of writing, ‘I love going to the beach for a swim.’

Write it this way, ‘Do you enjoy going to the beach for a walk and a swim?’

Subtle difference, but it works!

Instead of this, ‘I like to cook.’

Write it, ‘Do you like your man to cook for you while having a glass of wine together.’

Get the idea?

So why not edit your profile and delete as many ‘ I’s ‘ as you can.

Or set up a new one on a different site and see the results…

You will notice the difference quickly.

Focus on what you think the type of women that interests YOU, would like to read and do.

I think you get the picture with this and I won’t bother with endless examples.

This truly is a KILLER tip!

Try it out and good luck to you!

So instead of writing the word ‘I,’ rephrase it and use the word ‘you.’

Simple but effective and gets good results…

Until next time and more dating tips, keep smiling…

This articles quote;
‘There is always a way to succeed, if you are committed.’

  • Single Dating Places United Kingdom
    Single Dating Places United Kingdom

 

Making Dangerous Dating Assumptions

Dangerous DatingWhen men and women are dating, they always seem to make assumptions about what is going on in the other person’s mind. They have already decided on what the other person is thinking, what the other person wants, or what they need. Assuming things like this will lead to nowhere, fast. All that you will do is create misunderstandings, guilt, and potential embarrassing moments.

Here is a little story: Stacy’s sister was having a beautiful romantic wedding ceremony. Of course Stacy wanted to bring her date Michael to the wedding to share this incredibly romantic experience with. During the wedding festivities Stacy was flowing with joy and love that was in the air from the entire wedding atmosphere.

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She asked for Michael’s hand and wanted him to look deep into her eyes as they danced. But Michael acted cold towards her. Unfortunately for Stacy, Michael had already been bitten by the love bug for another girl just a week earlier and just went with Stacy because he thought that she just needed a friend to go to the wedding with.

The following are lessons that we can learn from Stacy’s experience:

Romantic-Couple-Wedding-Kiss* Do not have expectations. Whatever happens between two people is unpredictable and some people will react poorly to demands early on in the courtship. Without expectations then few feelings will be hurt if the date goes poorly and better yet if the date goes good, then it will be a ‘bonus’.

* Make sure that you both openly agree on exactly what the date is about and what you each are there for.

* Be totally honest with each other about other relationships from day one. If you are seeing somebody on a casual basis, be open about it!

* Be clear with each other exactly what the date plans are to be. Sometimes the person is not aware or not interested in what you have planned, which may cause the outcome to be upsetting to both of you.

  • Single Dating Places United Kingdom
    Single Dating Places United Kingdom

Identifing Narcissistic People Early

10-Signs-Youre-Dating-a-Self-Obsessed-NarcissistNarcissistic men and women are so self centered and self indulgent that they see friends and lovers as mere extensions of themselves. They are obsessed with flattery and demand to be adored and have attention to themselves at all times.

Unfortunately, these narcissistic types are very seductive and you may at first be attracted to them without realizing what you are stepping into. Because their egos are so very fragile, they constantly crave attention which eventually puts their partner at risk of being on the loosing end of the relationship.

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To help you with some tips on identifying whether or not he or she is a narcissistic type, ask yourself the following questions:

1. Does he or she loose interest when they are not the center of attention?

2. Are most conversations about them, whether you try to change the subject or not?

3. Is your partner always fishing for compliments?

Disloyal man with his girlfriend looking at another girl4. If you criticize him or her, do they literally fall apart at that criticism, especially if it refers to their looks or their mistakes?

5. Do you catch them talking about all of their supposed ‘lost loves’ whom each seemed to have had major flaws in which he or she had to break up with them?

6. If he or she is not getting special treatment or constant attention do they get mad or have a temper tantrums? For example if when they are not waiting on fast enough in restaurants, or did not get the best seats at the movies, are they upset?

7. Do you find a pattern of this person using people just to get what they want and then discarding them when their own needs are met?

If the man or women you are interested in shows any number of these types of behaviors then you may want to be careful. These are not the type of people to get involved in a relationship with if you want equal attention and love.

  • Single Dating Places United Kingdom
    Single Dating Places United Kingdom

How To Meet 250 Million Mates

 

She is gorgeousI am now involved in a permanent relationship with somebody I love very much.

She is gorgeous and probably the smartest female I have ever met.

But, before I met my mate I of course dated like everybody else; and I estimate that I probably dated, in some form or other, 100’s of women. I dated beautiful women, sexy women, ugly women, smelly women, classy women. prostitutes, young women, older women, you name it.

I made love to most of them, had one night stands and relationships that lasted for as long as 15 years. The funny thing is that you can always tell how a date is going to turn out within the first ten minutes. It is probably true that so-called speed dating works, because within the first couple of minutes into a date your mind decides and tells you:

1. WOW, now this is what I have been waiting for all my life.

or:

2. Well, she’s got a nice body, but for the rest….

or:

3. Got to get rid of this one pretty fast.

Let’s expand on No 1, the WOW person a bit more.

The first time I had a serious date I was 13. She was 15, a woman, and I was still a kid. She was very sexy and every guy on my street was jealous. She was babysitting her little brother at a playground and I was there as well so we started talking. And, you know, it is the talking that has been the most important tool in my dates. The fact that you can get to know another person by directly talking to her.

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To tell her about your ambitions, the things that interest you, the weather, flowers, the zoo, foxes, it does not matter as long as you communicate you will find out about the other person. I went on a couple of blind dates and they were not very good.

She was very sexyThe blind dates I got by answering some newspaper ads and I guess the ads promised more than the real goods delivered. And then there are the bar dates. After I divorced I spent almost every evening in bars for a period of about a year and of course you then make your own dates.

Most of them are one-night stands but some can turn out okay.

Actually, over time what I found out is that you meet the most interesting dates when you are not looking. I’d be very hesitant to join a dating chat room on the Web because I would always have this feeling that this supposedly gorgeous female is actually a 68 year old Grandmother.

However, I met this attractive 34 year old girl about a year ago and she finds the Internet Dating scene just the perfect way to meet men; does so all the time and sometimes flies all across the country to meet them, goes out with them for a while and then is not quite happy and finds someone new.

So now there is this fantastic opportunity to find an interesting mate on the Web, having the ability to communicate with more than 500 million people world wide.

Learn how to separate the wheat from the chaf and you have found a true goldmine.

Take adequate precautions with regards to people lying and cheating, apparently 40% of people looking for a mate on the Web are married.

Be a little cynical, but remember, if things don’t work out, try somebody else, and if that does not work out, try somebody else.

Enough fish in the sea, about 500 million of them.

  • Single Dating Places United Kingdom
    Single Dating Places United Kingdom

How To Get A Yes When Asking For A First Date

Couple dating and flirting in a restaurantAsking someone out on a date is not rocket science, but for some people it can be very overwhelming, especially when asking somebody out for the first time. By following the tips below you can help increase the odds of getting a YES when asking someone out on a date.

1. For starters you should wait for a relaxing environment when asking someone out for a date. Never make that move in a tense environment. You don’t want to come across as tense or stressed out. You want to appear calm and confident. It’s important that everything should just flow smoothly.

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2. Do not pop the question out of nowhere. The conversation should naturally lead into asking someone out for a date. For example, it would be ideal for both of you to have just finished talking about something that you both are interested in which brings comfortability and then an “Oh by the way…” is a perfect opportunity to ask for a date.

The-24-Worst-Things-for-Guys-to-Say-or-Do-on-a-First-Date3. Be sure that when you ask out somebody for a date try to do something that you enjoy doing and are good at. This will increase your confidence both when asking them out on the date and during the actual date. Confidence attracts people towards you.

4. If you did get that first date then your next job is doing all of the right things to get the second date, right? So while on that first date, be sure to have the attitude of giving rather than getting. Try to involve activities that he or she would enjoy. Do your best to create the date around them, showing your attention, and making them feel special.

5. Last but not least, just be yourself when asking him or her out on a date. Do not try to act like someone else or pull those one liners. Trust me, being original works every time!

  • Single Dating Places United Kingdom
    Single Dating Places United Kingdom

How To Be Sure Your Personal Ad Gets Noticed

online-dating-header2After much nail-biting and pacing, you’ve finally made the decision to join an online dating service. Now you face the seemingly monumental task of writing your personals ad. Sheesh, you say. How do I do this—especially when the personals you’ve taken the time to read through are so, well, let’s be honest, awful. All those abbreviations! All those long paragraphs! All the fluff that a over-sexed seventh-grade boy could see right through!

The trick to writing personals ads that get noticed are to be original and creative when it comes to writing yours. Think about it. Does a Volkswagen ad read like a Mercedes ad?

Of course not. That’s because though they’re both cars, they are completely different cars—just like two short, blonde women or two tall, brunette men. Other than sharing some physical characteristics and being the same sex, they’re going to be as different as a BMW and a Jeep.

So before you even start pecking away at the keyboard, think of yourself as a brand. This is easier for most people if they stick with the car metaphor. If you were a car, what kind would you be? If you consider yourself to be a Beemer, then your personals ad should be written to highlight your Beemer-ish characteristics. For example, you’d want to include your love of fine white wines and Prada shoes.

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On the other hand, if you’re a Beemer wannabe (and don’t feel bad, many of us are), don’t give in to the impulse to describe yourself as Beemer. Not only does this set other people up for a disappointment when they find out you don’t share their interests or meet their expectations, you may, worse, get stuck having to drink a lot of red wine at a cocktail party or theater when you’d really, honestly prefer is cold beer, pizza and a movie.

couple-speed-dating-960x500After you’ve defined yourself as a brand and can describe yourself thoroughly, from your tires to your, er, headlights, you’re ready to start writing that personals ad. You’ve already done all the hard work, so the writing will be very easy. And you didn’t think it would be, did you?

Some other things you want to keep in mind as you write your personals ad are:

• Keep it positive. That is, unless you want to attract someone who reads Sylvia Plath poems for kicks. Which, hey, is no problem if that’s your idea of a good time.

• Be short and to the point. This isn’t the place for your life history. Let that part come later.

• While keeping it short, don’t overdo the abbreviations. A few are fine, but too many are irritating.

• Hit your high spots. If you have the sleek lines of a Jag, say so. If you’re as trustworthy and loyal as a Toyota, speak up! Let your chrome wheels shine!

• Voice your passions. Yep, if you’re wild about 4-wheeling to the point you’d rather than have mud on your tires than eat when you’re hungry, don’t be afraid to say so.

• Creativity rules. You’re clever. Just that fact that you’ve found this marvelous way to meet people and find dates shows it! So you want to stay away from clichés in your writing, and think of new, fresh ways to describe yourself and your attributes. Saying you’re loyal will most likely get a yeah, yeah, but say that when it comes to your friends, you stick like mud on tires, now that will have people eager to know more about you.

Following these tips will help you write a personals ad that won’t just be noticed—it’ll guarantee you not only get replies, you’ll get dates!

  • Single Dating Places United Kingdom
    Single Dating Places United Kingdom

Dealing With Dating Anxiety

ways-of-dealing-with-dating-anxiety2-1462796296Life is stressful as it is and adding relationships to the mix can play a very negative role on your anxiety levels, especially if you already have a habit of developing panic-stricken attacks when it comes to love and dating.

Over the last 10 years there have been progress in various therapies to help relieve the burden of anxiety. It is best that you try to avoid taking drugs to cope your dating anxiety.

Below are 4 ‘non-drug’ dating anxiety prevention tips:

1. Instead of hiding your nervousness, admit it to yourself and your date. Often times what leads to a major anxiety attack spawns from trying to keep your initial nervousness covered up. If your ‘special someone’ comes into the room to see you then do not pretend your anxiety isn’t there. Simply say “I am sorry if I appear nervous, but I am very nervous right now”. Your date will appreciate the honestly and by telling him/her you’ll feel a lot better.

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ways-of-dealing-with-dating-anxiety3-14627963212. If you had an anxious episode during a date then afterwards do not beat yourself up worrying how you acted. It’s best just to give yourself affirmations in a positive manner that helps you build confidence and do better the next time around by taking control.

3. In order to calm down each time you have an anxiety attack, simply walk away and breath. If you happen to be with your new girlfriend or boyfriend then by following my previous tip on being honest with them about your nervousness, and also let them know that you need a minute alone, walk outside, and breath slowly until you regain composure. Before you know it, this simple technique will calm you down every time.

4. Pray... The power of prayer is amazing. Ask God for courage and strength to help you overcome your anxiety.

  • Single Dating Places United Kingdom
    Single Dating Places United Kingdom

Dating Communication Do’s & Don’ts

4_dating_list-909195-TwoByOneA very important ingredient to having a superior relationship lies in good communication. In fact, it is almost impossible to have any kind of relationship with a person unless you are able to relate to him or her. The ability to communicate effectively means that you have to pay close attention and to listen very carefully. We all have different methods of communication. You need to be able to understand, appreciate, and respect how other people communicate, especially your dating partner.

A good way to show your date that you are listening carefully to him or her is to repeat what he or she has said. Say for example your partner tells you: “You have been very distant lately”, you then say, “So you are saying I have been distant?” Follow up with an open ended question like “Tell me more about what you mean.” By saying that, you can verify what your partner has said and make him or her feel comfortable about talking to you about his or her concern.

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How you communicate with your words could bring comfort by reducing fear and easing tension. The following are some guiding principles to help you take advantage of your words and get your point across more effectively:

business-communication-versus-dating-communication-trudy-gilbertDO make the person you are talking to feel secure by offering a lot of support and appreciation. This gets the silent types to open up more and feel at ease.

DON’T make your date feel uncomfortable by judging, criticizing, or making fun of what he or she has to say.

DO relax. Feeling anxious can mess up your confidence and attention. Take deep breaths when you feel like you need to end the conversation because of fear or panic.

DON’T feel that everything has to be resolved at one time.

DO listen carefully and avoid interrupting while the other person is talking.

DON’T use offensive vocabularies and expressions. It is very disrespectful and cheapens you and the person you are talking to.

DO get to the point and be clear on what you want to get across or if you have any questions.

  • Single Dating Places United Kingdom
    Single Dating Places United Kingdom

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